Atypical Valentine
by AhmoseInarus
Summary: Reid believes that he has been stood up on Valentine's Day, but he couldn't be further from the truth... NOTE: This is the edited version to remain in compliance with the site's restrictions on explicit material.


Atypical Valentine

Ahmose Inarus

Disclaimer: I do NOT own "Criminal Minds" or "The Big Bang Theory"

SLASH WARNING!

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This is the edited version of my entry for the Smut Challenge for Valentines Day.

Rossi/Reid

Prompts: chess, flat tire, "Big Bang Theory"

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February 14th

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Spencer Reid paced back and forth across his apartment, his stomach filled with nervous butterflies. In half an hour, David Rossi was supposed to be picking him up to take him out for Valentine's Day… Reid had NEVER had anyone to celebrate Valentine's day with, so needless to say, he was both very excited and very nervous. The television was on in the corner showing reruns of "Big Bang Theory". Were Reid not so distracted, he would have changed the channel. He hated that show…

But seven o'clock came. And then it went. No David Rossi.

Now even MORE nervous, Reid forced himself to sit down on the sofa and stare blankly at the television. Fifteen minutes passed. Then thirty. And now Reid was just plain scared and upset.

"I should have known better…" He mumbled to himself, chewing his thumbnail and fighting back tears… he'd been stood up. No big surprise. Who would want to spend Valentine's Day with HIM, after all? Especially when you were a rich, handsome, successful man like David Rossi..? Reid bowed his head and sniffled. But then, just as the tears were about to fall… There was a sharp, almost frantic knock on the door.

Reid nearly jumped out of his skin, leaping off of the couch as though it had shocked him. He used the momentum of his startled leap to propel himself in the direction of the front door, stumbling and tripping over his own feet as he went. He winced when a stack of books toppled over across the floor. He didn't even check the peephole, he just flung the door wide open, looking half manic and half terrified.

"… Spencer?" David Rossi blurted, taking in his boyfriend's frazzled appearance.

"You came!" Reid yelped, and threw his arms around the man before he could stop himself. "I didn't think you would come but you actually came and you're late and I was worried and… and…" Reid sniffed. "You smell funny…" He stood back and looked over his boyfriend. "… And… you're a mess!" Rossi sighed and gave Reid a sheepish shrug.

"I'm sorry, Spencer." He said, stepping into Reid's apartment. Reid closed the door, blinking owlishly at the elder man. "I was running late picking up your gift and then I got a flat tire on the way and I couldn't find my cell."

"Oh… You uh… left it on my desk." Reid said, immediately fishing the phone from his pocket. Then he frowned. "You… got me a… present?" Rossi blinked, and then just grinned.

"Of course I did." He said, walking over and presenting Reid with a hastily wrapped gift that Reid had neglected to notice under the man's arm. "Happy Valentine's Day, Spencer. And Rossi kissed him on the cheek. Reid held the gift, which was quite heavy, looking stunned.

"Open it!" Rossi demanded, ad Reid did. Inside, was a chess set… A Batman Chess Set. Reid's eyes widened.

"Dave… Oh my God…" He gasped, now looking horrified.

"What's wrong?!" Rossi asked.

"Why would you get this for me?!"

"I saw you looking at it online with Garcia…" Rossi said nervously, now frantic that he had messed up. "And you said it was fantastic and that you would… love it…"

"But Dave!" Reid cried. "You have to buy each piece individually! And they cost between twenty and seventy dollars EACH! The board itself goes for a hundred! How much did you SPEND?!"

"… Is that all?" Rossi asked, now looking amused.

"This must have been like… " And Rossi could see Reid calculating in his head.

"Stop that. Right now." Rossi ordered. "I bought it for you because no matter how expensive it is, I'm rich, I can afford to buy you ten of these if I wanted to, and you are worth it. I love you."

And then, to Rossi's dismay, tears welled up in Reid's eyes.

"Hey hey hey! What's wrong now?!" Rossi demanded, alarmed.

"I… I… I didn't get you anything!" Reid cried. Rossi just chuckled.

"That's fine."

"And I didn't think you were coming tonight! You were late and I thought that you had stood me up when really you were trouble! You needed my help and all I could think was the worst of you and I—"

"Hey!" Rossi barked, knowing that if he let Reid get too wound up it would take forever to calm him again… Reid just looked at Rossi. "It's okay, kid." Rossi said soothingly, walking Reid over to the sofa and pushing him to sit down. "It's okay."

"But… we should go! The reservation!" Reid yelped, leaping to his feet as though he had sat upon a hedgehog. Rossi sighed and seized Reid's arm, yanking him back down to the sofa.

"They won't take us late…" He sighed, dolefully.

"… Oh…" Reid mumbled, and drooped. But Rossi just smiled at him.

"So I'm going to make you dinner right here."

"Here?" Reid asked, looking very baffled.

"Here!" Rossi said, taking off his blazer and unbuttoning the cuffs of his sleeves as he strode into Reid's kitchen. Reid squeaked and scurried after him. Rossi was standing in the middle of the space, looking around to see what he had to work with. And then, before Reid could stop him, he began opening cabinets. And the contents were… very unusual…

He found a drawer with silverware and one with cooking utensils that looked as though they had never been used. A cabinet of plates and bowls and cups, all looking immaculate, and a cabinet of pots and pans and dishes, all looking brand new. All these were, of course, perfectly normal.

But then he also opened a cabinet and it was entirely filled with coffee mugs. Another cabinet was entirely full of just about every variety of coffee imaginable. Okay. But then there was a drawer entirely full of condiments and plastic wear from take out restaurants, and stuffed in with them were countless menus. Alright, that wasn't THAT odd… but the next drawer was filled with…

"Reid?"

"… yes?" Came the hesitant answer.

"Why are you keeping socks and underwear in the kitchen?"

"Because that's where I had room."

"Do you have a dresser in your bedroom?"

"Yes."

"Why aren't they there?"

"There's no room."

"What's in the dresser?"

"My clothes."

"All of them?"

"Yes."

"You don't keep some in the closet?"

"No."

"Why?"

"No room."

Rossi sighed. "Then what's in the closet?"

"… Stuff."

"What kinds of stuff?"

"… Just stuff." Reid mumbled. Rossi eyed him, but then decided not to pry. At least not in this moment.

"Reid."

"Yes?"

"Why is there a football in the dishwasher?"

"Because that's where I put it."

"Why?"

"I was cleaning and didn't know where to put it. I just wanted it out of sight until I remembered to give it back to Morgan."

"… The teddy bear?"

"Morgan was being a jerk."

"And the plant?"

"… an experiment."

"… Okay." Rossi mumbled, eyeing the old fishing pole and toilet plunger next to the fridge, which was covered in neckties pinned there with magnets. In another cabinet, he found what appeared to be a miniature disco ball, a car's muffler, and an old computer with a wig perched on top of it, surrounded by other various knick knacks, most of which looked to be antiques. Rossi just sighed and shook his head, opening another drawer and peering in at the contents. "And the box of tampons and Hello Kitty Vibrator?"

Reid let out a wordless shriek of horror, turned bright red, snatched the things from Rossi's hand and then RAN, babbling in a high pitched hysterical tone all the way down the hall. Rossi managed to catch "Garcia" before wincing at the slamming of a door. All he could do was sigh and shake his head, and open the fridge to see what he could cook.

There wasn't much. There was some dried up rice and noodles from Chinese takeout, and a moldy wedge of cheese beside some shriveled vegetables. There were several half empty jars of pickles, and why Reid was keeping jelly beans in the fridge, Rossi had no idea. He closed the fridge and opened the freezer. There was a bit more to work with here, but not much… and then he spotted the scientific sample jars and little petri dishes… he quickly shut the freezer door and moved on the pantry.

Most of the space there was taken up by books… God, there were books EVERYWHERE. Rossi was wiling to bet that it was books that had filled Reid's closet so he had no room for his clothes… But finally, Rossi had to come to the conclusion that there was just NOTHING in this place he could salvage and create a good meal from. So he ended up shuffling through the take out menus and placing an order for delivery. And once that was done, he went in search of his boyfriend.

He found him in the bedroom, huddled down between the dressed and the wall, hiding his face in his knees with his arms wrapped around his folded legs. Rossi quirked a brow.

"Spencer?"

"… Top drawer."

"What?"

"In the top drawer by the bed." Reid mumbled. Rossi blinked, and walked across the room and opened the drawer Reid had indicated. The young man's revolver sat there. Rossi looked at Reid, confused.

"Just shoot me now." Reid groaned, and Rossi sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Don't be so melodramatic." The Italian chided. "Now come over here."

"No."

"Why?"

"If I get close to that gun, I'll take it, hunt down Garcia, and shoot her."

"Why did she give you a Hello Kitty vibrator?"

"I DON'T KNOW!" Reid cried, lifting his head and staring at Rossi with a slightly maniacal look. "Why does she do ANYTHING she does?!"

"Touche." Rossi chuckled, walking over and kneeling down before Reid, taking his hands and kissing them. "Have you… tried it out?"

"What?!" Reid squeaked, turning as pink as the sex toy.

"Have you used it?"

"No!"

"Why not?" Rossi asked, smiling at the sputtering he got for an answer.

"… Well… technically it's Garcia's."

"Well, she's not getting it back." Rossi said firmly. Reid eyed him.

"… Why?"

"Because. Tonight, you're going to use it.

"WHAT?!"

"On the bed, Spencer."

"WHAT?!"

"On. The. Bed."

"But… but… NO!" Reid cried, looking half frantic. Rossi narrowed his eyes ad pinned his boyfriend with a fierce look, and then pointed firmly at the bed. Reid whimpered, but then slowly drooped in defeat. He uncurled and slunk over to the bed.

"Strip." Rossi commanded. Reid gave him a pleading look, but then drooped once more and obeyed, fingers fumbling at his tie. Rossi held out his hand, and Reid gave his tie to the man, and then began to work on the buttons of his shirt after removing the coat of his suit. Rossi began to remove his own tie as Reid pulled off his shirt and let it drop to the floor. He began working on his belt, and so did Rossi. He held out his hand and Reid gave him the belt, then finally removed his pants, taking his underwear with them.

"On the bed, against the headboard." Rossi said, and Reid meekly shuffled over to the bed to do as he had been commanded. Rossi went with him, propping up several pillows so that Reid would have to lean again the uncomfortable wrought iron bars. Then he took Reid's right hand and kissed it gently, before pressing it against one of the bars of the headboard and wrapping his belt around it, looping it around Reid's wrist and across his palm, buckling it securely in place. Reid just watched, nervously. Rossi leaned in and kissed him gently, then moved over and bound Reid's left wrist with his own belt. He turned and kissed Reid's lips again, and smiled.

"We're going to have a little bit of fun." Rossi said, and Reid gulped. "You wait here." Reid nodded, squirming a bit. Rossi just chuckled, standing and walking out of the room. Reid gulped again, looking around the room and squirming once more as he began to worry his lower lip. But Rossi returned shortly with something in his arms, which he laid out on the dresser where Reid couldn't see. Then he turned and smiled at Reid. Reid gave him an apprehensive look, making the veteran profiler chuckle. He allowed his eyes to drop from his young lover's face to rake over his nude figure, his gaze settling between his legs.

"I see you're a bit… interested." He stated calmly. Reid squeaked and turned red, drawing up his legs to his chest to hide his manhood. Rossi chuckled and sauntered over to the bed and sat on its edge, reaching out and gently stroking up and down Reid's bare thigh. He smiled as this action elicited a shiver from his lover and he moved in, gently caressing Reid's lips with his own, now running his fingers through his lover's long hair. Reid sighed into the kiss and let out a soft coo, making Rossi smile. He had to force himself break the kiss, and then he just beamed down at the younger man. He ddidn't speak, he just ran his fingers down Reid's body and then pressed his palm against the youth's inner thigh, pressing on it. Reid resisted for a moment, but then allowed his legs to drop apart as Rossi guided him into spreading them. And only seconds later he was moaning as the man gently fingered his velvety length. Rossi smiled again and leaned in, whispering sweet nothings in both English and Italian into his lover's ear, glancing at the clock. Twenty minutes had passed… there was another forty or so until their dinner would arrive.

"Oh God, Dave, please…" Reid gasped, drawing Rossi's attention back onto him.

"Yes?" Rossi asked teasingly, sliding his fingers down to circle the base of his lover's erection before slipping lower to gently fondle his scrotum. Reid groaned at that, and Rossi smiled as he watched the muscles in Reid's thighs twitch. Then Rossi's fingers went lower, and Reid let out a soft cry of desire and anticipation as a fingertip caressed his quivering entrance. But then it left, and Reid let out a groan of frustration instead.

"I forgot the lube!" Rossi said cheerfully, and Reid whined, knowing that Rossi was just taunting him now. "And this… Happy Valentines Day... now open up…" Reid blinked, but then was unable to hold back a smile when Rossi offered him a chocolate covered strawberry. He obediently opened his mouth and bit into the strawberry, not breaking eye contact with Rossi. The man just watched in silent arousal at the smoldering look in his lover's eyes… until his gazed was drawn to the little stream of strawberry juice trickling from the corner of Reid's mouth, and a little piece of the chocolate shell sticking to, and melting on, his lower lip. As he lowered his lubed fingers between Reid's legs, he leaned down and kissed him, gently licking at the chocolate and strawberry juice. Reid groaned at that, leaning into the kiss and parting his lips, giving Rossi a tantalizing lick as an invitation. Rossi indulged his lover, chasing the youth's tongue back into his mouth with his own. The flavors of the chocolate and strawberry exploded over his tongue as he tasted the inside of the young doctor's mouth.

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The rest of this scene has been removed to keep the story in compliance with the site's taboo on explicit content. You may read the full version on Adult Fan Fiction . net. Thank you.

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They lay together, entwined, and Rossi's hands gently caressed the youth's skin as they both came down from their sexual high. He kissed over Reid's face, and after a bit, Reid turned his head and smiled up at him. But when he opened his mouth to speak, there was a knock at the door.

"… And that would be dinner." Rossi said, and Reid huffed slightly. Rossi chuckled, reaching up and releasing Reid's hands from their bonds. "Relax." He said, standing and pulling on Reid's robe. "Clean yourself up. We'll eat here, in bed… and then I'll make love to you again. And again… and again… God, I love Valentine's Day…" And with a devlish grin, he turned and left the room, leaving Reid lying on the bed, his genitals tingling as he imagined the additional fun to come… and hopefully that vibrator would come into play again, too…

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Happy Valentine's Day!

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Please review!


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